Isn’t it unhealthy to expect things from people?

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My Dad is constantly complaining about other people’s flaws. He complains because the preacher doesn’t come to visit his father in the nursing home. He feels like it is the duty of the pastor visit ill seniors of the community. He has never asked the pastor to visit my grandfather in the nursing home. It is really frustrating talking to my dad. I tried to tell him that the pastor has a life of his own and has his own problems. I feel like my dad is a very naive man to expect people to read his mind and do things to please him. Is this normal for a 53 year old man to think like this?

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4 Responses to “Isn’t it unhealthy to expect things from people?”

  1. 1
    Emily S Says:

    A lot of people think like this. It’s not healthy, but there’s nothing you can do other than explain the truth to him.

  2. 2
    randa032477 Says:

    Your Pastor is probably busy with other Congregation members……visits, etc too. Also your father should put in a request and not just assume. Your father probably doesn’t even realize what the Pastor’s schedule is like. I’ve had a lot of experience with this since I’ve Assisted Pastors in both the military and in civilian churches. Trust me they are extremely busy. With all the members of just one church they have to schedule everything. I hope this helps.

  3. 3
    wishnuwelltoo Says:

    Actually your dad is right. It is the job of the Preacher and other members in the church to visit those in need, whether at a nursing home, a family home, or a hospital. It was your Grandfathers tithes and offerings over the years that paid for the Preachers salary. Your Preacher should know your Grandfather is in a nursing home, it is his job to know his parish and their needs. I guess you could send a letter to the Preacher reminding him your Grandfather is in the nursing home and what room he is in. Everyone in the church is called by God to serve in different ways. Some people teach sunday school, some people sing in the choir, some people are called to do visitations, some people are called to do the electrical work for the church. I knew a lady who played organ for the church for 30 years and when she had surgery no one from the church came to visit her in the hospital. It really is unbelievable how inconsiderate some people are. They go to church, sit in a pew, and have no idea how much the person sitting next to them is hurting. Write a note for your Preacher and remind him where your Grandfather is and what room he is in, and could someone from the church stop by and visit him from time to time. Not everyone is called to pay tithes and offerings, but most people have the gift to listen to someone and visit someone in a nursing home. Peace be with you.

  4. 4
    person Says:

    You should start a new hobby or other interest without calling your dad’s attention to it and then one day complain to him about how he hasn’t taken any interest in your new hobby. When he says something like "I didn’t know" say to him something like "You’re just supposed to know everything about my life without me having to tell you, just like it’s the pastor’s job to know everything about everyone in the congregation’s life without them having to tell him."

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